In a Drunken Galaxy Far, Far Away

It's no wonder that people have such a hard time allowing gay marriage. Especially when in some states like Georgia they are still quarrelling over whether or not to allow people to purchase alcohol on Sundays! A bone of contention with me when living in Atlanta. In the state of Georgia they still have not been able to smack down the Christian right-wing fools and "convince" the senate for Sunday sales.

It's another bleak picture for change. Just because most of the country is doing it does not mean that everybody is doing it! In Georgia there is nothing out of the ordinary about thinking you can't pick up a six pack of beer on a Sunday for your day at the park. It's as if it's normal for people to not be allowed to do this.

After living on the west coast it is unfathomable that such steep laws against alcohol sales even exist. What is the matter with people? What does the restriction of alcohol sales on a Sunday help to do? Aside from rape the state of beneficial tax revenue and many other fabulous benefits. The only thing it does is pack the liquor stores on a Saturday night with people stocking up for their Sunday festivities. That along with leaving some very depressed alcoholics on a Sunday who forgot or ran out of their life-saving beverage first thing Sunday morning. I know you're wondering how could someone dependent on booze forget to purchase it on Saturday, but trust me it happens.

Have they not learned yet that if someone wants to do something, they're going to do it? It doesn't matter what laws are in place or how many electric fences are erected to keep a person out. They're going to do what they want when they want. You can arrest, fine and lethally inject people to stop them from doing something, but there will always be someone else following right behind to do it anyway. Is that a good argument for letting people do what they want? Yes, in most cases. Especially when it comes to that wise logic of do whatever you will as long as it's not hurting anybody else.

The only defense they provide for not selling liquor on a Sunday is keeping people on the straight and narrow with the Lord Jesus Christ. Which continues to boggle the mind because in the real world there is no Lord Jesus Christ and anyone I've ever met on the straight and narrow are the crookedest folks you could meet.

Buying alcohol on Sundays will keep people "good." Don't let people do what they want. People can't be trusted to take care of themselves. Is that how it is? Protecting the sanctity of the good folk. Those whom button up those blouses and fasten their neckties real tight, worshiping false idols in expensive churches run by child molesters and slipping politicians bribe checks under bathroom stalls. Those whom go home and close the blinds to practice all the sinful atrocious acts they preach against. But that's alright, because they do it in private.

What is the matter with people?

Where have all the Cowboys gone?

"They" say time on the Internet moves much quicker than time in reality. I've lived on the Internet a long time and after taking almost a year away to live amongst non-Internet folk, I come back to find myself in The Twilight Zone. It's your usual story about the man who goes into the bomb shelter and comes out to find ...

What does he find? It could be exactly what he saw before he went underground. He may find that a new city of the future has sprung up. He could peek his head out to discover alien spaceships whirling around firing at Terminator robots 100-stories tall! He may find a planet completely run by meerkats (pictured right).

I've poked my head above ground back into the Internet planet to find that people have done what people do best: Fuck it up further. Where in the hell is everyone? I swear, I leave you alone with your tinker toys and Playboy Magazine for one second and you ruined it. Didn't you? It looks like a lot of folks have become bored with the Internet. I sauntered around and it looks like most people spend times reading Huffington Post and spending hours refreshing their Facebook page. Oops! There I go showing my age. Pages refresh themselves in the 21st Century.

People aren't networking like they used to and that makes me smile. It's Facebook or bust. The good thing about Facebook though is it appears to have obliterated what us Oldsters call "The Blog." They have this thing over on Facebook called "Notes." You write notes and your friends read the notes, but they aren't really blogs and it's given people permission to no longer say anything of comment. Just notes. Just Post-it's on the refrigerator door. It's what the sheeple always wanted. A boring dream come true. A snapshot of the nation.

There are plenty of blogging platforms left, but people are terrified to share their opinion on the Internet anymore. That's Facebook's fault too. They are the ones who gave a crushing blow to the grass roots of Internet anonymity. Anonymity was the way we Internet Super Stars meant it to be, my dear Internet babies.

I've come to find that there are very few "good" blog network communities. This makes me smile too because if it's harder to find bloggers then there appears to be less of them. While I'm certain there are not less of them, they do appear to be a background whisper to what people now use the Internet for. Opinions and commentary are still everywhere, but it was always the infringement upon the personal blogger / webmistress domains that got me riled. Leave us alone. Leave Britney alone!

I sat and pondered on an Internet tree next to a beautiful Internet lake as to what my Internet has become. Remember the days when everything was personal site driven? I would never have signed up for any service to help me do anything (post picture, movies, blogs, etc.). It was all setup on my own domain and nobody got a piece of my pie. That was the point of growing up to be The Internet's First Super Star. Learn to do it yourself and screw everybody else. But now it's been flipped and reversed. All celebrities, personalities, friends and your neighbor's cat prefer to just have a domain with links to other places. An interesting change. Change I can not believe in, but change I can deal with. Thanks for the simplification, guys.

So I return with a site and links, because I have better things to do than design fully structured sites. I have things to say, just like everyone else, and instead of working on the layout I'd much rather say it, type it, speak it, record it. If "they" want their Internet to be streamlined with neutral walls and art from Posters.com on the wall, that's just dandy because the Internet goes psychedelic with me in it even if it is a streamlined P.O.S.

As my first act of returning to the throne I will be appearing LIVE on Cotolo Chronicles this Thursday at 6PM PST / 9PM EST to do our annual Roll Call From the Bone Garden! We will be reviewing this year's dead in the most refreshing of ways. You must tune in! (http://cotolochronicles.blogspot.com/)

I have poked my head out of the Internet top soil. Now where the hell has everyone gone!? Welcome to the Internet of the future. Fucking meerkats everywhere ...