Health Care vs Natural Selection

Recently getting all of my impacted wisdom teeth surgically removed at the same time was one of those alien experiences for me. The entire process fascinated more than scared me. It was all like a field trip to an observatory, from looking at the neat x-ray of my entire mouth to actually being put under. The recovery process was no walk in the park either. At the same time I wouldn't call it painful and it wasn't annoying at all, at first. It got tedious around week three. It all reminds me that I'm very disconnected on so many levels. Was it pain? I don't know. I hurt but I wasn't dying. I have always thought that pain must hurt a lot worse. Much like dying! So, whenever I'm in pain I check to see if I'm dying and when I discover I'm not I have to wonder if the pain is all that painful.

Groups of these monkeys often establish
 a dominance hierarchy determined
by aggressive behavior. Just like us
and our health care system.

The experience brought to light the need for health care. I spoke to many people about the situation and a lot of them told me they need to have their wisdom teeth out too. That they had lived with the uncomfortable throbbing of those third molars for many years. They also made it very clear that the only reason they could not have them removed was not being able to afford it.

I lived with that throbbing annoyance of impacted wisdom teeth for ten years until I did not want to deal with it anymore. Thankfully when I was ready to deal with it I was able to pay a surgeon to extract. It was expensive. I was not happy with the bill. It dawned on me throughout this that people suffer a lot because they can't afford it. That may be common knowledge to some, but it still really frustrates me when I realize we still live in that kind of world.

It all makes me wonder that if we are all supposed to be equal loving human beings then why don't we take care of each other better? They have been arguing for a better health care situation endlessly. Nobody has come to an agreement and when they came close it was just more bull. We need to decide if we want to take care of everyone or let natural selection take its coarse.

I guess I am one of the few people who just wants the truth from their dictators. It's obvious that the people who can afford care get it and live. Just like those who can't get it either suffer and stagnate or die sooner. I want them to come out and tell us the truth. They need to tell us that health care is a luxury and if you can't afford it then you can't. Health care isn't a new Mercedes, yet that's exactly what they make it. But the people wouldn't like that. So they accept a carrot being dangled in front of them while being told, "Well, we just haven't figured it out yet!"

What exactly haven't they figured out about getting everyone health care? Maybe what they can't figure out is how in the world would we all survive if we were all better off? Maybe they have figured it out. It wouldn't work very well. Unfortunately we are what we are, creatures refusing to believe in natural selection and demanding to override it. I don't blame them. It's what we do! Humans, monkeys and insects alike.

It does not make me happy knowing that I get the relief in my mouth, sinuses and jaw that I always wanted, while others are basically not allowed to do so. It's almost aesthetic. It's a situation no one should have to deal with. If I needed a heart transplant I'd understand that it might cost money to save my life and that I might not be able to afford to save my life. But to have painful teeth removed and be kept from it? That's just deviously masochistic of "them" to put such a high price on.

We all may be victims of natural selection and unequal in wealth, power and safety. But I think if there's one thing we deserve it's the right to be slightly comfortable. It's the least we could do for each other in a world that boasts such things and rarely delivers.

I'll Be Hating Religion for Lent

Every year it happens and every year I can't believe it. People you never believe would do so start lining up to get ashes swabbed on their head and making "resolutions" to refrain from doing things for several weeks for the Catholic ritual of Lent. It's like when you find out someone cool is ... well, participating in something you consider very, very uncool. Which brings some very uncomfortable feeling to the forefront.

Some people say they're participating in Lent for the challenge of giving something up and staying away from it. That's as bad as people going to church for loving support of community through Jesus. More over, a pair of gays getting married in a church that honors a religion that states they are going to hell. You do not participate in an organization that you disprove of. If you do not approve of priests getting away with rape, the banishing of persons for sexual preference or centuries worth of lies to control the populace then you shouldn't give them the time of day. Isn't that hypocritical? I would not participate in any Christian religion because I firmly believe it ruins more lives than it saves. That's enough reason for me. It didn't even have to get to the way they conduct business or rape your children to make up my mind.

For me it's more of a difficult decision to keep liking these people than wondering why they have decided to do the things they're doing. I've always been out there with people and I happen to like knowing everyone. Plus ... people just freaking adore me. This fills my world with a very broad spectrum of people. And yet it still twists my mind into a billion pieces when I find out someone I thought of as pure awesome is a conservative-thinking Sarah-Palin-Supporting Catholic-church-on-Sunday-going individual!

How does that happen and how should I feel about it? I don't know if I'll ever have the right answer. There is no conclusion to thought of understanding how you can love someone and absolutely hate their views and choices. To most this is easy to deal with because you may feel that people are people and are allowed to get behind some pretty stupid business. To you it may feel like a matter of personal opinion and some sort of diversity. But you need to understand to me it's as drastic a comparison as finding out your best friend is Adolf Hitler. Not the same thing? I don't think so. Killing Jews is bad, but so is supporting an organization who has made gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transgendered people (to name a few) be outcast, murdered and generally treated like shit.

Would you support the KKK if they presented you with a challenge to lay off chocolate or saying "the F word" for a month? Probably not and probably because you don't agree with the whole bothersome "black people thing" going on in their organization.

As much as I'd like to continue thinking people participating in religion are as cool as I thought they were, I can't. I can still agree that they are "nice people." You can be a nice person outside of your affiliations but quite frankly we are our affiliations! A nice girl who knits is a knitter. She's not just a nice girl. She's a knitting nice girl. I am an artist and a writer. If people forgive the things I say and choose to like me detached from everything I choose to be a part of then they may seriously be misguided in that decision.

There comes a time when we have to tell people what they are doing is not helping. Just because you're nice and maybe even awesome is not going to stop me from asking why the hell are smearing ashes on your head in support an organization of old men who have enslaved people for over 2,000 years? That and think just a little bit less of you for your decisions to do so.

More Closet Dwellers Than You Thought

Recently I came across The OUT Campaign while browsing through the site of scientist Richard Dawkins. I had to click on the link because my first thought was what is this straight atheist scientist doing creating a campaign to help homosexuals? Come to find out it's a campaign about coming out ... as an atheist. It's true that many people need to come out of the closet for many things, but we rarely think of anything else but the coming out of the homosexual variety.

This all got me thinking about how much pressure an atheist has coming out in comparison to a gay, bisexual or transgendered person. Could there be even more social stigma and black sheepery cast upon an atheist than that of a closeted gay? It's a tough call to make. In the end it's all pretty damning depending upon the when and where. At the moment it may be worse to be an atheist than gay. As sexuality begins to be less of a horror, believing in God is still mainstream The Way to Be.

As a teenager it was difficult to come out of the closet as being bisexual or gay. (I did both.) While I never believed in coming out to everyone as particularly necessary, I do see it important today. For one it just makes life more simple. You shouldn't have to go through life protecting pronouns when you talk about your ... significant other. Clawing desperately throughout each conversation to talk about the one you love or the places you go, trying your best never to be completely clear and out yourself. It's a pain in the ass. When I talk about my husband I don't want anyone to raise a brow. On the other hand I still don't come out. I just am. Those who can not tell my sexuality from my personality likewise don't become surprised when I inadvertently come out in conversation. That's thankfully the world a lot of us live in today. Few people are surprised to find "a gay" among them.

Which is exactly it. We're finally in agreement that there are gays everywhere but how many people assume that there is an atheist among them? Just about as many who think there is a wiccan or satanist among them. Unfortunately it's yet another something that few people are thinking about. It's uncool. It's out of the ordinary. It's not on TV. Hit and miss throughout society you will find people who can accept you for being an atheist, but there are very few who aren't nervous about the conversation.

I am an atheist. I find that I can't discuss it much. I am also gay. I find that I can discuss that - a lot. People will accept me talking about my partner as my husband. The state will give us equal rights as those whom are married. They will all smile and nod throughout the entire gay situation, but not the atheist situation. Just the other day I was having an open conversation in a room with several folks discussing what each of us believed. One was Mormon, the other Lutheran and the other was non-church attending Christian. I noticed that when the conversation swung in my direction and I stated I had no interest in God, religion and was an atheist it got quieter.

It wasn't until I brought up my opinion that I don't care what people believe or think as long as they keep it in their back yard and allow me to think what I want for my own life. Then everyone was in agreement and continued on discussing freedom of religion. Isn't it odd how they felt an atheist point of view was included in freedom of religion? Freedom of religion is no religion, that's for sure.

Perhaps why it gets quieter when an atheist is discovered among the God fearing is that no matter how you slice it, you can't help but realize the atheist most likely thinks you're an idiot. There they are talking about feeding a unicorn and I'm in the same conversation saying unicorns don't exist.

While I don't believe in God I do believe in a lot of things. I can agree to a lot of cosmic theories and such things because they are universe-based. But I certainly do not believe in the existence of an angry sky daddy waiting to send me to the fire pit. I don't believe in churches or books written by men pretending they are the word of a god. If we want to talk about how everything is connected and there is beauty everywhere, then we're good. That's not religion, that's science and reality. It really is the truth as it's right there in front of us. The religious God has no proof backing his existence. If you want to discuss the stars in the sky and how we are all linked in some amazing way then let's, because we are.

Nature is beautiful. The galaxy is amazing. Our link to everything and what consciousness may be within that is incredible. Eternal life on a cellular level is something all by itself, let alone what more there may be to that. It is what it is without an unknown oracle in a golden chair upon a cloud.

One could go on forever discussing their beliefs and that's why it's such an enormous can of worms. But like most cans of worms it is important to pop that top. We're left with this hard to discuss subject that needs to be discussed as to lose it's ridiculous shock value. Just like men having sex with men and women transitioning to live their lives as men. Yet there are so many different personal definitions of "atheist" just like there are of a religious person or a gay person. And unfortunately when someone says they are atheist everyone assumes it is a black and white Gothic angry statement saying they believe in nothing.

Therefore I'll leave it there with the statement that it is not black and white. It is not Gothic or angry. I'm an atheist, but that doesn't mean I don't think there's something to life. Just not God.

It's Perception, Not Aliens

If aliens exist they are probably
Pete Burns and The Artist D.

I am not ruling out the existence of aliens from another planet driving fancy space ships (with probes!), angels, spirits, ghosties, auras or amazing visual experiences unexplained by science; but some people are just idiots. I have a "visual symptom." It started almost over ten years ago. The eye floaters you sometimes see darting around in your field of vision are actually permanent for me. Over time they get darker, stringier and more significant. There are also small dots, almost described as invisible tiny pin pricks. As well as "static," tiny points of light darting around across my entire field of vision.

If you experience such things suddenly it is always a good idea to seek a doctor as your retina may be detaching. However, on other people whom have to put up with this symptom forever it just simply seems to be a fact of life. It doesn't go away. It just gets progressively worse with age and you have to work around it. Causes are unknown. Head trauma, infection and lots of other general possibilities exist.

I spent most of my time with visual static without knowing what to call it or if there were any support groups. Like anyone with something annoying that won't go away, I want to know other people are suffering equally. Recently I discovered the name is blue field entopic phenomenon and plenty of people have to put up with it. It is good to know, because even after a doctor tells you that your eyes are fine you still have to wonder if all this junk floating around isn't "bad."

Doctors call them permanent floaters and either shrug their shoulders at them or propose shooting lasers into your eye for the heck of it. That being said I was stuck with the Internet on this one. The problem is that it took me ten years to Google the right terms to find out anything scientific about what was going on. Every time I would consult the oracle (aka Google) I would have to wade through tons of UFO / GOD message boards about how seeing things immediately means you are having a spiritual experience. One person asks on Yahoo! Answers if anyone else see small points of light dancing around in their vision when they look up at the sky. "Yes," another person answers, "you have the gift. You are seeing another dimension of space where angels exist. I see it too!"

Page after page of perfectly rational descriptions of people with eye floaters and static convinced it's cosmic revelation. When I was a child I used to look up at the sky and if I stared long enough the center of my vision would go a bit purple and pulsate with my heartbeat. The common reaction when staring at something bright for too long. Even then I knew that what I was seeing was in my head and the pulsating was because of blood flow. Even though I would pretend I was seeing another portal into some other dimension. But I was five, not thirty-five, and I didn't go posting on message boards that I could see into Zordon X. (Surely another dimension that exists!)

Sometimes I look up at the sky at night and without really being able to focus in on much I will see three planes coming in to land. The light on each plane form a huge triangle in the sky. I am instantly reminded of those Unsolved Mystery stories in the 90's where people claimed to see huge triangular shaped alien spacecraft in the sky. I bet that's what they were seeing. Three different points of light moving perfectly in sync with each other, in the dark, while their mind filled in the rest that it was one big triangle coming to get them.

Point being, for crying out loud, know what you're seeing and know that your mind is very inventive. We see things. It is our eyes that are seeing and it's only up to our interpretation how to process that. If you don't know floating shadows and static sparkles can exist in your vision then of course you would have to perceive what you are seeing is external. Unfortunately, a lot of the time, it's all in our heads.